Choice to change.
It’s within you.
It’s what you want that matters.
What is the difference between self help and help yourself?
Good question. Glad you asked. From my perspective and experience self help is a lack, showing up as not enough; not being good enough, smart enough, fast enough, pretty enough, clear enough… and on and on. Enough already.
Help yourself is about abundance. It is what I am told at my family dinner table and allows me to have as much as I want. Freedom to have what I need. Freedom to choose what I want. Freedom to go back for seconds or thirds. It’s about options, choices. Maybe like being at an all you can eat buffet. Or being in the strawberry patch and you can eat as much as you want. Or even like God’s grace and love. Get it? Help yourself! It’s all yours.
Choice to change. It’s what you want that matters.
You have over the years changed your outside. Your clothes, car, relationship, place you live, friends, and maybe hair style, etc.
Do you know that you have a hidden potential, a well spring of untapped natural resources that can help you better navigate the challenges you face as well as putting your past to rest.? What if old memories no longer feel disturbing? What would it be like if you could change your story? Right. You can’t change what has happened to you but you can change how you hold it. Every experience we have has been recorded in our subconscious mind. And now there is an effective new way to harness the power of our inner resources.
Within each person is a natural ability to heal that is disrupted after a traumatic experience. We would never expect a wound to heal if we just put a bandage over it. When you have a wound, your body cannot heal until the wound has been cleaned of debris. In the same way that debris inhibits our bodies’ ability to heal, a serious trauma disrupts our natural healing system.
Serious trauma is defined by you. What you experienced. How you view what happened makes all the difference. You matter. What you think matters. What you feel matters. What you want matters.
Try to tell a teenage boy who has just had a girl break up with him that his pain of rejection is nothing compared to Dad not getting his promotion. To the young girl who is feeling great about her new outfit and hair that day and ends up being picked on and ridiculed by a group.
Bullies, “Stick and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me.”
The problem comes with the vow we make, what we will do to protect ourselves and what we come to believe about ourselves because of the incident.
The experience may be over but the story your memory network has created about it continues to run your life.
There are many positive resources that can be tapped into that comfort us, lift our spirits or empower us.
Resource tapping is used to reduce anxiety and depression, help with sleep, increase creativity and performance, aid in healing, and decrease.
Stress after a traumatic event.
Strengthen and stabilize your processing abilities. With this the tools and techniques used you may easily adopt them as your own practice as well to help alleviate daily stress. Wouldn’t it be great to have steadiness of mind under stress? To be “cool” and “assured” instead of freaked out and stuck without choice. Because you know how it is, when you get stressed out you cannot see your choices.
I recently saw the movie called “Captain Phillips” 2013 starring Tom Hanks, based on a true story with samoli pirates, a biographical survival thriller.
I had to use my techniques and resources as I watched this traumatic thriller. I was astounded that Captain Phillips was given NO emotional tools as support as he was evaluated in sick bay. What can be done to soothe the nervous system? To deactivate the fight or flight system?
That’s where I come in. Let me tell you about me. I am known as “The Options Girl”. I got that name after 25years telling patients in the hospital how to be empowered and make the choices they want. For example, my teaching would include 2 rules. 1-Ask for what you want.
2- Don’t ask a question to get an answer, ask what are my choices, or options so that you can choose.
I am passionate about changing the world one option at a time. Life events and our interpretation of those events can throw us off balance and trigger feelings of fear and anxiety, and depression. And we criticize ourselves for not doing better. Getting rid of negative self talk could change the world. When we get stressed we become off balance and cannot see our choices. By creating options and resources to live a balanced life.
We have positive resources that we can access, but Nobody Told Me.
You are welcome to check out my series called Nobody Told Me. Soon to be released.
That’s all interesting
Let me tell you something more interesting
That brings us to where we are going today
I want to walk you thru the process
Following me so far?
Let me reiterate.
And the Golden Question is….What do you want? To change?
A common answer is usually what you don’t want. So key is the opposite of what you don’t want.
You will be preparing a tool box that you will have handy.
The goal is to begin to identify, cultivate, and enhance the resources that are beneficial to us.
My story used to include a tool box like in my garage, and I’d be lucky to locate it. Now my tools are handy. And you know the easiest way.
Use the simple tools first.
What you want matters. You matter. It’s within you.
The Options Girl
AKA Rita Duncan RN.LMP.
Certified Assertiveness Training Coach
EFT/( Faster )EFT Advanced Practitioner Level 4